Another Adventure

Reading is one of the only forms of escape I still have left.

Anyone who knows me, knows of my love for books, and anyone who has known me for a long time, knows that I rarely go anywhere without a book or a Kindle or at the very least, a magazine. I had a rough childhood and reading was one way I could bury myself in another person's world, forgetting my own problems that at the time, were inescapable. Once again, in my current time of inescapable crisis- books are my savior.

I'm re-visiting the Harry Potter series. Currently on the third book, 'Prisoner of Azkaban'. Reading the HP novels is something I do enjoy, although I think I came along too early to really enjoy them the way a child could (I was already 17 when the first book was released). Still, they're fun and creative and my favorite part of each book is the lesson within. Well done, Rowling.

Despair

Been in this same old hopeless mindset for months. It's getting worse. I'm out of options if this one last attempt to get help is denied.

There are a million questions revolving in my mind. Am I doing a bad thing? Am I deserving of this help? Am I over-blowing my situation or is it really as bad as I think it is? Do people realize the situation I am in, or do they just not care? Am I being a crybaby? How strong am I supposed to be and how weak am I allowed to be? Who is on my side? Who can I really trust? Where do I go from here?

I am so exhausted from trying to keep it together. I am ready to let go in all ways. I don't know how much longer I can live a life like this.